Man Guide to Menstruating Female

Holy Hormones Journal: Talk about a picture speaking a 100 words – and in this case add in “The Last Straw” as the image was so aptly titled. Yes, hormonal fluctuations can affect a woman’s life, mood and state of mind. That is why my co-author and I wrote our book “Understanding Your Mind, Mood and Hormone Cycle.” Although the advice to men is well done – we are all forgetting one thing. PMS is a biochemical condition. If we understand that – we can correct the imbalance with the use of nutrient and detox – and with an awareness of how to live with our menstrual rhythm and not against it.

Many many moons ago I was in a doctor’s office waiting for my husband in a small clinic in Cheyenne Wyoming. They year was 1993 – (yikes) and I happened to pick up a Glamour Magazine (yikes again!). As I thumbed through the magazine I happened to catch a small blurb in the side column. (What I call an “Oh by the Way,” article.)

Lifesaving news about your period –

“While most women hardly need to be told that their hormone cycle affects their body; few of us suspected it could make the difference between life and death. But research with breast-cancer patients is starting to suggest that scheduling a patient’s surgery according to her cycle may increase her chances of being cured. And that’s just the most prominent example to emerge from a small but growing exploration of the relationship between women’s monthly hormonal changes and common illnesses, ranging from migraines to irritable bowel syndrome.”

Awareness of hormone health is important for so many aspects of our lives. Our menstrual cycle is a vital sign of our health – a barometer. If you are falling down the rabbit hole once a month – something is amiss. Women should not be experiencing “period woe” – and neither should the men in their lives.

Dr. Jed Diamond, PhD of MenAlive fame joined me on a podcast in December and spoke about the fact men have hormone cycles as well… (why not?) Men and women both have the same endocrine system based on circadian cycles and similar hormone messages that affect our minds, moods, and behaviors. He explains the hormone influences that create such a personality shift for both men and women.

Bottom line is that it is not normal – sadly, though it is becoming the ‘new normal’.

Elephant Journal
Via on Sep 3, 2015

What I Wish Men Wouldn’t do when I am on My Period. A Complete Guide

Unless you are a female, it is unlikely you understand a woman’s menstrual cycle.

From PMS (Pre-menstrual Syndrome) until the monthly period stops, a woman’s body goes through many hormonal ups and down. These hormonal fluctuations can affect her life, mood

The Last Straw

The Last Straw

and state of mind.

For many women, it’s as easy as pie. I know a lot of women who don’t experience PMS and, luckily, don’t feel any pain during their periods. Some women—like me—have mild pain before and during the menstrual cycle. And for others, the pain experienced can be intense enough to trigger the nervous system.

From my own experience, and on behalf of the women I personally know (and all the women who go through severe menstrual pain), I can at last say the famous line often used by men:

It’s me; it’s not you.

To put your mind at rest, there is not much a man can do. In my experiences and those of my female fellows, men try their best to alleviate the pain their women go through. And we do appreciate it quite a bit, but we often fail to tell our man what not to do.

To start, I would suggest that men do a simple visualization when their woman’s period is drawing close.

Imagine her period like a campfire. The more you stack wood onto it, the bigger it will grow. However, if you leave it alone, the fire will stop burning by itself. And most importantly, don’t come close to it, as there is a big possibility you’ll burn yourself. To prevent this from happening, I advise constructing a fire ring with stones and staying at least three meters away.

I hear men asking, “What should I do?” Sadly, I can’t be of help when faced with this question, but I can absolutely offer a list of what “not to do” when I metamorphose into a wild and unrecognizable creature.

1. Keep distance.

When I’m going through severe pain, get more stones and make the fire ring bigger. Whatever men try to do—patting, cuddling or stroking—it’s advisable not to. My body during my menstrual cycle is similar to burnt skin. I can feel every tiny touch in a quite unfathomable way.

2. Don’t keep too much distance.

Yes, I know. It’s a bit confusing, but it gets easier with time. As I mentioned above, it is highly advisable to keep your distance, but don’t keep too much distance and physically disappear.

I have to admit that there is a mysterious connection between our hormones and ego when we’re in pain. Many women—including me—seek attention, presence and love when our uterus is shedding its line. Hence, to keep me satisfied and away from delusional depression, you should physically stay with me.

Remember though, no physical contact when I’m in pain.

3. Step away from the line, “I understand.”

Maybe some men do. Some were raised with sisters who went through intense periods that introduced those men to the hell through which a woman goes every month. However, whether you truly do or not, I suggest not claiming it when I’m rolling over in bed from pain.

A funny story I’d like to share without any intention of scaring you: A friend of mine once hit her boyfriend with the ashtray that was next to her bed. (Relax, nothing happened.) He only told her, “I understand what you’re going through.” And so, she picked up the ashtray and threw it at him screaming, “you don’t f****ing understand!”

Hence, to put an end to possible flying ashtrays, I recommend using, “I am here,” instead of, “I understand.”

Read full article…


Author: Leslie Carol Botha

Author, publisher, radio talk show host and internationally recognized expert on women's hormone cycles. Social/political activist on Gardasil the HPV vaccine for adolescent girls. Co-author of "Understanding Your Mood, Mind and Hormone Cycle." Honorary advisory board member for the Foundation for the Study of Cycles and member of the Society for Menstrual Cycle Research.