by Vild P.
July 9, 2012
Just over four weeks ago something happened to me. I woke up in the night with terrible abdominal pains. It was the longest night I’ve ever experienced, I was all alone and there was so much pain. It just didn’t go away – instead it steadily increased. There was a point when I became frightened by the severity of the pain, and then I realised it was so serious I had to go to hospital.
It turned out I had a large ovarian cyst and was given an emergency operation the same day. The cyst was the size of a cantaloupe melon – and to think I had no idea I even had one! I, who am so in tune with what’s going on with me? I was very lucky, the operation went smoothly and I am recovering well. My ovaries are undamaged, thank Goddess. The shock of it all is slowly passing too…
As I’m sitting here contemplating what’s happened, I recall my last period prior to my operation. I experienced the most outrageous PMS I’ve ever had – I got so angry I nearly killed my friend’s kitten. The cat is safe and my friend’s still my friend, but it was a little scary to feel so out of control. At the time I thought it was a catharsis due to some deep detoxing and cleansing – and a large part of it probably was. I’ve ditched many issues and healed much damage these past few months, but now I’m thinking that perhaps the extreme nature of my rage was also connected with my enormous cyst. I’ve learned my lesson, I’ll have more frequent check-ups at the doctor’s…
A friend tells me that Dr. Christiane Northrup suggests large ovarian cysts could be caused by stress or blockage of creative energy. I have given this a lot of thought, and must agree with her. I am always so in tune with what’s going on in my life and with my cycle, but sometimes I have ignored the obvious. Gritting my teeth and getting on with it is something I’m very able to do when it’s required. My life was indeed very stressful a few years ago, and my creative energy, which usually flows freely and powerfully, was stifled and strangled. I was in a bad place in many ways, and have luckily made the necessary changes and moved on from that.
Since then I’ve made a complete life-change, moved countries and taken up university studies. I’m a different person, I’ve made new friends, I’ve got a new life, I’ve got love. It’s a real second chance for me. Now, I recognize stressful periods as stressful and not just ordinary, I recognize lacking sleep and not just going into autopilot. Now, I no longer drink three pints of coffee a day and I stopped smoking four years ago.
As part of this process I’ve been undertaking some deep detoxing and cleansing this spring, and I believe this was what made me ready to part with my cyst. I was determined to heal whatever needed healing, and not getting to the root of my health and well being-issues was just not an option for me. Just one week after telling this to a friend I was on the operating table having my cyst removed. It seems I get what I wish for!